Pull Over to Create Greater Ease in Your Business
A different approach for when you’re feeling pushed growing or marketing your business
One morning, a few months ago, after dropping my youngest daughter off to school, I was driving along a street behind the school and noticed a school bus behind me. I looked at my watch. There were only a few minutes until the first bell. The bus was running late too.
Suddenly, I noticed a push inside. Go faster, a voice said.
And, yet the speed limit next to the school is 15 MPH. You better not speed, you’ll get a ticket.
I kept my speed.
The push continued: The bus needs to get there so those students aren’t late.
And so did the response: A fine example you’ll be for your soon-to-be-driving daughter. Tense, I continued on the same.
This small example of something that played out over a few seconds one May morning contains a microcosm of what many coaches, healers or creative entrepreneurs face while trying to show up and market their business in an effective, authentic way.
The Push
The first thing to notice is the push.
Have you ever shown up at your desk on a Monday fearing you’re behind and that this time you really, really need to get out there and get going with your business? Or maybe that you’ve taken a day, or a week or more, off and are feeling really really behind?
The push may come from what you believe. Perhaps consciously or not you think your business should be somewhere other than where it is. Or maybe that you need to ‘make up time’ for being away on vacation. Or that you’re behind others in your field who started at the same time you did.
It may be because of how you were raised. Perhaps you were instilled with a relentless drive to achievement, an inability to rest, a suspicion of apparent idleness.
Any of these or others could be the cause.
And – it’s everywhere. The push is everywhere in our culture. On TV, the internet, other coaches’ messaging. It’s the foundation of colonialism, and capitalism – a never-ending quest for more.
The Constraints
Think of the constraints as objective circumstances. That morning I was in a school zone.
I value protecting our children from impatient drivers, so I support low speed limits and ticketing where needed. Importantly though, whether I value this or not doesn’t change the fact that it’s a law and there are city police out enforcing speed limits. That’s a constraint.
In business, you want to be authentic. Of course, you can build a business, copying someone else, imitating their marketing messages and strategy. But chances are this just doesn’t feel right. One of the reasons you got into coaching or healing or other creative work in the first place was so you could do work that felt good to you. That’s a constraint for you.
And there are other constraints to growing a business. To be effective, you need a solid, well-articulated starting place for your marketing. You need to put your business’ foundational elements in place - including your messaging in creating strong offers, an authentic effective website, compelling content, and consistently run, impactful campaigns.
Your ideal clients need to travel the along the buyer’s journey before they come to trust you and can say yes to working with you.
All of that is needed and developing and doing all that in a way that supports you and your business and helps you reach your clients, well, it takes time.
The Problem
When you’re feeling that push with your business – wherever it’s originating from – it shows up in your body. It may feel like a tightness in your upper thighs or a clenching in your hands or shoulders. It’s subtle, and, if like me, you’ve lived with it a long time without noticing it, it can feel pretty ‘normal.’
If it goes on unnoticed for long enough, your personal energy reserves start to drain.
And, it shows up in what you work on. Maybe you create a flurry of Instagram posts or slew of messages around a project. Those things aren’t bad in and of themselves, but the underlying energetic pattern is one of shoving or force.
When you’re working from that energy, that’s what gets transmitted from your work.
The other issue is that it can drive you to ignore the constraints. You might unconsciously start adopting ways of being that are subtly out of alignment, resulting in you building a business that may work in some ways but doesn’t feel like it’s home.
Or you may forget the time it takes to build a business, allowing discontent and discouragement to build.
An Alternative
That morning near the school, after noticing how tense I was, it suddenly occurred to me that I could simply pull over and let the bus pass.
As soon as I did, I was flooded with relief. My legs relaxed and I took a breath.
Such a simple thing.
All I did was step for a just a few seconds. In the moment I was pulled over to the side of the road, I could more fully see why I was feeling tense. Then, I was then able to move forward without the anxious push and continue my way home.
You can do this with your business too. All it takes is two things – noticing and deciding to pause.
Take a Note
It’s the first step to any transformation, bringing awareness to what is going on. If you’re feeling anxious about an aspect of your business, any, or are feeling behind or that you need to really get on it!!! in any way, just notice.
Notice any emotions you might be experiencing and how you’re feeling in your body and take note.
Decide to Pause
Then, in the moment if you’re in a position where you can ask yourself some questions right then, decide to do. (If you’re in a meeting or otherwise engaged, decide to do this right after.)
It’s helpful to first take a breath and re-orient yourself to your surroundings and the present moment – wood chair, orchid plant, window, laptop.
Then, you can inquire as to what might be going on. Is there something you’re feeling the need to push at? What’s going on? Is this an old pattern at play or something more?
When you’re feeling pushed building or marketing your business, this feeling is coming from somewhere else, outside your own inner wisdom.
Often just taking a moment to stop and step aside is all that it takes to refresh and reframe your perspective. Other times, you might discover something a little deeper or more complicated that might be going on, and an invitation to do further inquiry.
Either way, you’ll be able to move forward with greater ease.