Shifting your self-talk can transform your journey

Have you ever found yourself endlessly scrolling social media instead of signing up for a creative opportunity that’s been whispering to you for months? Or maybe you’ve felt paralyzed staring at a blank page, unable to write a paragraph—or worse, unable to make time to sit down and write at all?? Maybe you're an entrepreneur with a brilliant idea that never quite makes it out of your notebook…

Or perhaps you have been moving ahead, but it’s feeling heavy, like you’re dragging yourself along to get anything done.

Does this sound familiar?

If so, one thing that might be at play are the messages you're giving yourself.

What do I mean by that?

A while back, I joined several author/writing groups on Facebook. After exploring and sorting through some of the less helpful ones, I landed on one that seemed positive and uplifting.

Scrolling through the daily updates, I enjoyed hearing about what people were working on, seeing their progress, and celebrating milestones. I checked in frequently, often commenting or congratulating to lift new writers. I would share insights and just appreciate being part of community.

All was well until I noticed something had shifted.

After a while, I realized I had started visiting the group less frequently. And when I did visit, I wasn’t commenting on posts. Yes, I had been busy, and yes, the group was massive (over 25k), so there were a lot of posts.

But I suspected something else was going on…

Especially since I’d been feeling a bit blah about my own writing

I’d been sending fewer pieces out, making less time to submit. In truth, my writing was feeling a little flat.

My underlying energy had shifted

I realized that since joining the group, my internal messaging had changed. Every day there are many posts from writers and authors from every part of the world. They are sharing their published cookbooks, poetry collections, and memoirs.

They are touting their family histories, novels, and sci-fi series.

What was happening was every time one of those authors posted, overjoyed, and sharing her book, I was subconsciously telling myself something that simply wasn’t true:

I was making the fact that they had their books in hand—while I’m still in the process of looking for a publisher and finding a home for my manuscript—mean that my work wasn't good enough.

I was telling myself that my writing wasn't good enough

With a jolt of insight, I felt both embarrassed and optimistic. Embarrassed, because one of the things I do is mentor writers, and I should know better, right?

Optimistic, because what I know from my nearly eight years of coaching experience is that you can always change your thoughts.

When an editor or panel of judges or your best friend says they don’t like your work, what does that mean? Really?

All it means is that it wasn't right for them at that time.

It could be they’ve shifted their criteria. It could mean there were thousands of submissions. Your personal voice, piece length, style, subject matter, genre, may not be a match…

There can be literally hundreds of reasons why someone’s work is selected and yours isn’t, none of which means that your work isn't good.

Once I realized that it was my internal messaging that was making me feel stuck, I could shift into a dialogue that felt more helpful.

Instead of “my writing isn’t good enough” I could say “my writing is perfect for the right opportunity” or “my writing is authentic to me.” I felt lighter. Freer.

And importantly, I could then take action.

I made a new list of places to send several poems and manuscripts to, and I’ve already sent submissions to the first few.

Looking at your own messaging

So, if you’re feeling stuck in your writing or your personal growth or your purpose journey, it’s worth taking some time to look at what you’ve been telling yourself.

No matter what stage of your journey you’re at, becoming aware of your internal messaging lets you see where you might be standing in your own way and discover a different way forward.

If you’d like more information on any unconscious messages, beliefs, or patterns that may be impacting you and your desire to change something, I invite you to sign up for an Intuitive Energy Reading. You’ll walk away with clarity on what wants attention, an understanding of your energy dynamics, and a practical next step to move you forward.

Photo by Dawid Zawiła on Unsplash