The first time I watched Disney’s Encanto a few months ago, my daughter declared, “Camilo is my favorite!”
“Oh,” I said, surprised. “Which was he again? I don't quite remember him.” Of course, I knew who Mirabel was, and Abuela. And Luisa. And, of course, Bruno. But Camilo?
“He's the shapeshifter,” my daughter answered.
I watched it again this weekend. And there he was, sliding in and out of scenes effortlessly, taking on the form of who he was next to, adapting their voices before slipping away in the background again.
He was good at hiding.
Hiding in Business
I should know about Camilo. Because I was a shapeshifter in my previous corporate job. In fact, it's part of what made me so successful at it.
My clients loved me.
If they loved knitting and talking about their nine-old son, I was rapt, and talked about my daughters and crafting. If they lamented their career trajectory, I related. I talked about similar experiences, sharing what I noticed. I supported them. If they scowled at the latest dust-up at the EVP level, I cooed. I soothed.
I reflected their own thoughts and emotions.
Internally, I did the same thing.
I made myself fit in with key leaders. If they liked their meetings run ready and crisp, I’d do that. I’d have outlines before calls, the notes distributed to the relevant parties, deliverables summarized neatly. If the leader’s style was chattier and more informal, I shifted. I’d be collegial, tell appropriate family stories, share inside jokes fit the overarching thinking of the group.
Changes in bosses or management passed through seamlessly in my world. I simply adapted, unruffled.
People saw me because I was good at letting them be seen. And they liked that.
And while that may have worked well for my employers, it didn’t, I came to realize, work for me.
And, from what I know helping coaches, healers and creatives who care about authenticity and want to feel good and effectively market and grow their businesses, it doesn’t work well for them either.
What’s Really Needed – You, The Real You
When I was at my job, I was hiding. No one saw the real me. But that doesn’t work anymore. The truth is, authenticity is magnetic. This is as true in life as it is in your business.
When you are doing and sharing and being yourself, you naturally attract people. When you do it bringing your gifts to the world in the way you feel called to serve, people pay attention.
You attract colleagues who are pulled in by your energy alignment. You attract clients who can feel your sense of truth, your naturalness and bravery. You attract opportunities to share more of you because people see you, the real you.
If you start your own business and assume, even unconsciously, that you have to market and do things like Ms. Fab So-and-So or grow a kick-ass business that looks and feels like the Powerhouse Mindset Boss you see every day in your inbox, you won’t find your own voice.
You’ll run the risk of looking and sounding like someone else – or everyone else. You’ll lose the one thing that automatically differentiates your marketing and business – you!
And when that happens, something feels off.
It may be hard to put your finger on, but it’ll be there. Your ideal clients will feel it, and they won’t feel good connecting with you. And you won’t feel good about it either.
Yes, there are things you do to develop your business.
There are mechanics and systems and marketing you put into place to get your business going. But to really start connecting with your ideal clients, you need to be you. You have to stop being a shapeshifter and come out as yourself, surrendering to the vulnerability that comes with being seen.
Step by Step
The good news is that learning to become more visible in your business is something you can do over time and in small, consistent, doable steps.
It doesn’t have to look like you probably think it does.
In fact, it can look like a lot of different things – like telling a true, deep story in your next blog post, talking about a hobby you don’t share about on social media, sharing your feelings about something you feel deeply about, or even reaching out to someone you met in a class and asking them if they’d like a Zoom coffee date.
You don’t do it because of the results you think you’ll get.
You do it because that’s one of the reasons you decided to start your coaching, healing or creative business in the first place.
You want a place where you could be more YOU. You want a place where you could take your gifts and talents and gather them up in a beautiful basket, offering them to help make a difference in the world.
You do it because the work makes you feel more alive, on purpose, and just plain good.
And that sounds like something to show up for and and shout about.