“I just don’t want to be pushy.”
I was talking to a new client a while back and that was her response to me when I started asking, with genuine curiosity, why she hadn’t been promoting her offers more often than she had been.
It’s such a common thing.
So many authentic coaches, healers or creative entrepreneurs don’t want to be a bother, or seem rude, talking about ourselves or our businesses all the time, so they hold back.
Maybe they remember icky experiences we’ve had when salespeople have bombarded us with syrupy, manufactured interest. Usually going anywhere near a cosmetic counter in department store gives you that feeling. The salespeople, often lovely young women in lab coats, pose a question or comment, usually about something you’re wearing, just to strike up conversation. Before you knew it, though, they’re going on and on about the benefits of Clinique’s new moisture cream or Lancôme’s latest highlighters.
I used to hate it so much, I’d scurry into another section of the store and take the long way out into the mall, just to avoid walking anywhere near the cosmetics corner.
No one wants to be that person.
The one that causes others to duck around the corner when they see them. Or - the one that causes people to cringe when they see their name pop into their inbox.
So how do you market without seeming pushy?
Like so many things, it starts with intention. From there, everything else flows. If your intention is to make people buy something from you, you’re going to transmit that into your marketing. On the other hand, if you approach marketing to make connections and be in service to those who might need your help, not only will your marketing and energy be different. More importantly, you’ll feel differently too.
A not-so hidden agenda
Let me share an example with you.
Say, a friend of yours complains about her sister-in-law’s housecleaning drives them crazy. Every time she comes to visit, she’s tripping over Playskool blocks and piles of board books. Stuffed animals are in every room, and there’s usually a fresh sprinkling of cracker crumbs across the kitchen counter. A few raisins stuck the floor.
In reading the latest Better Homes and Garden’s magazine, your friend hears about Marie Kondo’s book, The Life Changing Magic of Tidying Up. After looking at a few reviews of readers who say they’ve given away garbage bags full of possessions and their houses are now serene oases of calm, she decides this is just what her sister-in-law needs.
The next time she sees her sister in law, she mentions the book, telling her how many other people have found it so, so useful. Your friend might go on to explain that for the cost of the book (just $12.17 on Amazon!) people have completely transformed their lives. She brings it up time and time again, even switching the subject to talk about it.
Now, keep in mind, your friend hasn’t read the book herself. But she’s convinced her sister-in-law needs it.
She eventually buys a copy and one day leaves it “on accident” at her sisters-in-law’s house. Her sister-in-law just needs to pick it up an read it for goodness sakes. How much easier could she make it?
Another approach
In contrast, let’s imagine you just read a new book. You love, love, LOVE it! It’s full of practical wisdom, inspiring exercises, and wickedly funny insights.
What might you do?
Well, you might bring it up in a conversation or two after you finish it or even while you’re reading it. (I did this just last week with a powerful piece of fiction, Driftless, and an older, but still relevant nonfiction book of essays by bel hooks, All About Love.)
You’ll probably tell your mom, your sister, and definitely your best friend.
You might recommend it in your book group as a possible selection for an upcoming month. Perhaps you’ll list it in a Facebook Group, offering it as good reading for a quiet weekend, inspired motivation, or whatever fits the bill.
What’s the difference here?
In both scenarios, there’s the idea of a book helping someone.
In the first example, though, that help was really for your friend. So, she’d feel better going to visit her sister-in-law’s house. It has nothing to do about what the sister-in-law needs or wants.
In the second case, you believe in the book because you’ve seen and experienced how helpful it was. Your enthusiasm in talking about it to others who might find it helpful comes through naturally, authentically.
Your offers and your marketing
You can approach your marketing and talking about your offers in the same way.
If you have a genuine desire to help people through your work, and you’ve lovingly crafted an offer you think will help your potential clients with a problem they have, then talking about it becomes a way for you to channel your genuine enthusiasm about the offer. Your marketing isn’t pushy.
If on the other hand, your main (or sole) purpose in marketing the offer is for you to make money, then it’s likely going to come off that way.
Notice I’m not saying making money has no place in your business. It does. If you want to approach marketing from a place that feels genuinely better, and is ultimately more effective though, it can’t be your primary focus in your marketing.
Pushy sales and marketing tactics feel pushy because they’re based on trying to get someone to do something we want them to do. Authentic marketing feels so much better, for both the practitioner and the potential clients, because it’s grounded in a deep desire to be of service. I want you to go out and talk about your business in a way that feels freeing and genuine so you can help the people you’re meant to serve.
Now that’s something worth pushing for.
Do you have the feeling you need to be braver in your marketing?
If you know deep down you need to become more visible in your marketing your business, but you don’t understand exactly how to do that or aren’t sure you have what it takes, I’m inviting you to have a conversation with me. We’ll spend time talking about your business and what’s emerging for you now, and I’ll let you know what I think is going on and what might be good for you to focus on first. You don’t have to do this alone. For more information, click here.